Oh jesus, I've gone and done it again. I suck so much at keeping this thing updated. I'm the most un-dependable (is that a word?) blogger ever. In fact, I don't think you can really consider what I do as blogging so I'm probably not worthy of the "blogger" title. If I ever told anyone that I have a blog, they'd come here, shrivel up their nose and say "That's not a blog!" very condescendingly.
Never fear, I am here now and I have an assortment of stories to tell you. I think this is my problem: My life is really rather normal and routine and so I have to store up a collection of anecdotes to share with you all at once because it is really only the sum of them that seems to matter -- individually, they suck.
So, first things first.
I lost my job. Well, that's not entirely true. I didn't technically lose it, but rather it was "eliminated". That's not quite accurate either. The truth of the matter is that my job wasn't eliminated, I was. So, basically (now that I've managed to beat around the bush), they decided that I wasn't what they were looking for...six years after the fact. (I was in a different part of the company for 5.5 years and just recently moved to this other area) But, because I am a nice girl and work hard, they came up with some technical bullshit about re-certifying my position to be more than what I am experienced for and therefore, they needed to hire someone who was qualified. Folks. Let me just pause a moment to say that this job they "re-certified" that I wasn't qualified for, is the position of an Administrative Assistant. A Secretary. That's right. Puleeze.
I believe that I am a good employee. I believe that I have an excellent work ethic. I love to work. And, not to toot too loudly, I'm actually a rather intelligent gal. My supervisor and his cohorts knew that I was only working for my benefits. They knew that my bank account was being padded from a different source of income (I have a full-time freelance gig with a "major cable network") and so they didn't hesitate to eliminate me in order to get someone who would be "committed" to the work of stapling and photocopying. That's my opinion anyway.
I'm unbelievably lucky that I have this freelance job but it's still difficult because I am losing health benefits and a lot of other really nice benefits of being an employee of this company. But, I find this a freeing change for me. Despite my resentment towards the way the whole thing was handled, I know that this may quite possibly turn out to be the best thing to ever happen to me.
In other news, Chris and I celebrated an early Valentine's Day this past Saturday night. Let me say this about Valentine's Day: When I was in elementary school, I loved Valentine's Day. I couldn't wait to decorate my shoe box or white lunch bag to put all of my Valentines in. I loved picking out Valentine candy like those nasty little conversation hearts. I knew we would have red or pink cupcakes at school and plenty of cinnamon hots shaped like hearts. The very idea of leaving someone out would have never crossed my mind back then. Granted, I was very discerning with my Valentine card giving. I would not give a "Be Mine, Valentine?" to just anyone. But, no one was ever excluded. I loved celebrating Valentine's Day at school more than any other holiday.
Then puberty happened and I became the pathetic girl who's father sent her flowers from a "secret admirer" just so she didn't feel so left out. And outwardly, it worked. The flowers give the illusion of a happy and loved girl. But inwardly, it just made me feel even more pathetic. And it never really got better from there. Even in my short marriage, Valentine's Day sucked. This concludes the "woe is me" part of our tale.
Annnyway, my point is that I haven't exactly made it a priority to celebrate Valentine's Day. However, I'm not one of those that vows to wear black in a boycott of Valentine's Day (although I did try it for one year but I just felt like I was carrying a big sign that said, "Look at me. No one loves me. I must mourn." so I never tried that again) either.
So imagine my surprise when this year I realized I would be in the odd predicament of actually being in love with a decent human being for once in my life. It suddenly occured to me on Friday afternoon that he was coming up for our early V-day celebration and that I hadn't really planned anything for him. I know that many people say it's a girl holiday but I don't really believe in that one-sided bullshit. I figure if you're going to celebrate it, you may as well give it too.
So, I ended up buying him a hand-held shower head because he's very difficult to buy for and he'd been raving about mine for months. Now, he has his own. I also cooked dinner (Chicken Cordon Bleu, Red-skinned Mashed Potatoes, this really fattening ritz cracker corn casserole combo, and chocolate fondue for dessert!). It was a lovely evening and I realized that Valentine's Day isn't as bad as it seems. Okay, it is. I still don't like Valentine's Day because I'm just really uncomfortable with the marketing idea that I have to be in love in order to feel good about myself.
Nonetheless, it was a very romantic, sweet evening. And today, he sent me flowers.
Anyway, moving right along...
You know, I'm just not much of a blogger (as we've established earlier) but there's been quite a bit of hatin' going around on some of the sites I do read. So, in the spirit of giving more than I take...here's my Valentine to you:
Great New (to me) Discoveries that Make Me Smile, Laugh, or Feel Lighter After a Visit:
You Can't Make This Stuff Up
one day i will write a book
Clueless in Carolina
not that you asked...
Self-Made Man 