Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Okay, so I know I should like this movie, if for no other reason that it stars Johnny Depp. Eh, he did a good enough job but I much preferred the Gene Wilder version of the Willy Wonka character. I wish that they had kept a lot of the little rants that Wilder's character did in the original. He didn't show enough fake concern when each child met their fate in various situations throughout the factory and I missed this whole monologue:
There's no earthly way of knowing
Which direction we are going
There's no knowing where we're rowing
Or which way the river's flowing
Is it raining?
Is it snowing?
Is a hurricane a-blowing?
Not a speck of light is showing
So the danger must be growing
Are the fires of hell a-glowing?
Is the grisly reaper mowing?
Yes, the danger must be growing
'Cause the rowers keep on rowing
And they're certainly not showing
Any signs that they are slowing.
Overall, it was an okay re-make but it left me longing for the first one with all of the crazy, psychodelic, acid trip Oompa Loompa songs and the musical montages like "Pure Imagination", "Cheer Up, Charlie", and "I Want It Now".
Also, I thought Depp looked like Audrey Tautou in Amelie with an Elton John complex.
You be the judge.
Love Me If You Dare
I rented this a few weekends ago and have been meaning to mention it. This movie was excellent. I just could go on and on about it. It was twisted and totally warped but it made me very happy. In fact, there were so many great quotes but I couldn't find any of them online so I played parts back in slow motion so that I could write them down. For example, this little rant:
"It was pure, raw, explosive pleasure. Better than drugs, better than smack. Better than a dope-coke-crack-fix-shoot-sniff-ganja-marijuana-blotter-acid-ecstasy. Better than sex, head, 69, orgies, masturbation, tantrism, Kama Sutra or Thai doggy-style. Better than banana milkshakes. Better than George Lucas’ triology, the Muppets, and 2001. Better than Emma Peel, Marilyn, Lara Croft and Cindy Crawford’s beauty mark. Better than the B-side of Abbey Road. Better than Hendrix, the first man on the moon. Space Mountain, Santa Claus, Bill Gates’ fortune, the Dalai Lama, Lazarus raised from the dead. Schwarzenegger’s testosterone shots. Pam Anderson’s lips. Woodstock, raves … better than de Sade, Rimbaud, Morrison and Castaneda. Better than friendship. Better than life!"
I highly recommend it.
Self-Made Man 